Is he cheating? Or isn’t he? How to know for sure
Adultery: How can you tell paranoia from evidence
In Sandwell, UK and all around the world people live in fear and cheating paranoia of being the victim of infidelity. “Is he cheating?”. “Is she cheating?”. Your best friend and your boyfriend seem awfully chummy and you find out they’re texting each other on a regular basis about things that are completely unrelated to you—supposedly their common element. “Are they cheating?”.
Living in fear and paranoia is a terrible thing. Just ask anyone with a guilty conscience or an addict who has gotten his fix but now feels like the whole world knows about it. Why anyone would bring this type of dread upon themselves for the sake of a relationship they obviously don’t think is solid is beyond me, but millions of people do it every day. I say let what will be just be. If you have worked yourself into a frenzy of distrust, jealousy, and paranoia over a “lover” who is constantly giving you new reasons to worry, then you’ve got to ask yourself some hard questions about where you’re at in your life. Let’s take a look at a few, shall we?
Adultery: What’s Wrong With You and How Can You Fix It?
If you are putting yourself through the miseries described above you have got some serious holes in your own psyche you need to deal with before you continue jumping from one dysfunctional relationship to the next.
Things happen to us in life. Good things, bad things, awful things. Experience, of all kinds, is simply part of living, and as an adult you must learn how to face and deal with these triumphs and tragedies as the equal imposters they are. What do I mean? Just this: nothing is quite as good or as bad, as high or as low, as dark or as light as it may have seemed at first. This is not a personal philosophy, it is simple fact. Much of our perception of events in our lives is wrapped up in our emotions and how they color our reality. Keep this in mind the next time you think you have found “the one”. That person you must hold onto at all costs… even if you come to distrust them on such a basic level that it eats you alive. This is not love, it’s co-dependence. So don’t fall for it.
Search yourself and find out what’s missing within that keeps you from being happy regardless of your relationship status. When you find out what that missing link is go out and seek it with all your heart, mind, and soul because when you can catch up to it and integrate it into your life you will heal yourself. And when you do that, you will no longer live in fear and paranoia of being cheated on because you will either be happy by yourself or you will seek and attract higher quality mates who will not make an old man or woman out of you before your time.
It is a simple concept: “first take care of yourself so that you can be healthy and then reach out to care for others”. Just like the instructions they give you on the airlines about securing your own oxygen mask first before trying to assist your child or a person in need next to you. The reason? If you pass out before you can help them, now you aren’t any good to either one of you. So many people miss or ignore this simple truth, especially those who repeatedly put themselves through the hell of a dysfunctional relationship that sucks the life out of them.